Events in this morning's history 162 class (US History post Civil War- I don't remember the actual dates, thats how good of a historian I am) have made me decide to write this little post: a little list of certain historical facts* that are often misquoted or twisted so that they no longer made sense, and that really rub the wrong way. I'm sure my friend Sarah is rolling her eyes right now (though I'm sure she agrees with me on most of it,) but I can no longer resist the urge to blog about them.
1. "Let them eat cake"- Marie Antoinette (cake being the crusty charred stuff at the bottom of a stove, not the yummy sugary delight. I'm sure the fishmonger wives would have been overjoyed if Marie had offered them cake since butter and sugar were luxuries they could only dream of). For the record: she never said this. I think it was a newspaper that claimed that she did but it wasn't true. So for a history professor to say that she did is just downright sad. And annoying. And worthy of being kicked multiple times in the shin.
Cake sure sounds yummy now!
2. The vikings didn't just raid, rape and plunder. They also settled, farmed, assimilated, were amazing navigators and seamen, and are responsible for some keep aspects to our modern-day government. The word "law," for example.
The Oseberg Ship- only picture I could think of on the fly.
3. The Middle Ages should never be called the "Dark Ages" unless you want to be put on a spike by yours truly. No, it wasn't the beautiful classical period nor the neoclassical period of the Renaissance (funny how classicism is always the standard, but no one mentions the orgies) but it wasn't just a time of waste and nothingness. Schools and universities were developed, architecture was brought to new heights, and the illuminated manuscripts are breath taking. You could say it was dark due to the lack of electricity or the multiple appearances of the black plague, but to say that there wasn't any sort of intellectual development is just plan ignorant. And it pisses me off.
Lindisfarne Gospels, ca. 8th century. Carpet page, but I don't remember which gospel this goes to off the top of my head
4. The Vikings did not wear horns! It would be an understatement to say that I am obsessed with the Vikings, so things related to them tend to fluff my feathers (is that even a saying, or did I just make that up?) rather quickly. Think about it, though. If you were going to design a helmet for yourself, what is the last thing you would want on it? Handle bars. The idea is to protect yourself, not let the enemy grab you by the head and swing you around. Maybe one viking had a helmet with horns and I can bet you anything that he didn't live past his first raid.
"Look mommy, no horns!"
5. Henry VIII didn't decapitate all his wives. Thanks to the current phenomenon surrounding the Tudors (thanks Showtimes!) this isn't as big of an issue anymore. I would like to point out, though, that Henry didn't just sleep with everyone and kill his wives. He made England one of the riches countries of that time (though his method for doing so is not to be praised. Poor monks, but picturing him as Jonathan Rhys Myers makes it seem so forgivable.)
Can I just say "yummy?" Now I need to find a way to blog about Henry Cavill.
Ok that's all I have, for now. I know there are a lot more I could rant about, but I'm supposed to be writing a paper (make that 3 papers).
* the word "fact" is almost impossible to use when talking about history, so I only use it in the lightest possible sense. Also, if anyone wants me to add citations here, I will, I'm just being lazy.
